10/30/2018 8 Comments A Week of Three Good ThingsIf you are healthy, you are wealthy! That is one of the main talking points I use when speaking at treatment facilities every month. Part of my treatment from addiction was to learn gratitude and how that is not just spoken word. Every night my soul mate and I write out ten things we are grateful for. Anytime that I want to complain about an area of my life, she always tells me to write a gratitude list. What I found is that I have luxury problems and I looked like a spoiled brat. “If we all put our problems on the table, you would take yours back,” Unknown. The truth is life could always be worse so I need to learn how to appreciate the blessings I do have and not worry about what I do not have. This is a mindset that took years or growing pains to realize how truly blessed I am. I honestly believe this is the best assignment I have ever been given in any class. EVER! I am blessed to be a part of this class. Tuesday, October 30:
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10/30/2018 1 Comment WAKE UP: ITS REALI came home to my monthly magazine issue of TIME and the front cover was full of guns. Four issues prior was about guns. This tells me that America is just not getting it and people are getting rich off of this as well. Each gun that is used in a killing someone made money off of it. Now the person that sold it could be a good human being that helps people. The question is how do guns get in the wrong hands of people with serious issues? I am a person with a mental illness and I believe we should not have access to guns. I would never hurt a fly but the truth is I am medicated. Even off medication I would not hurt anyone but the risk is not worth the reward. I was reminded this weekend of how deep this issues is in our country and also how deeply divided as a nation we are. People are being kilt because of beliefs and this has honestly been going on since the beginning of time. It just seems the killings are getting worse and worse. For any human being to kill in the masses in a church settings tells a lot that person. Sometimes I wonder how can a person be so broken and no one knows anything? Have things gotten so bad that no one cares about one another to the point schools are being shot up? I am just trying to make sense of these situations that all to many keep happening. I watched the documentary about the shooting in Newtown Connecticut and I will never forget what the one parent said. To this day. every time I think about it my heart gets heavy. I wish I could put you at that moment of how I felt when she made her point. It hit my heart so heavy when she made this point. She was pregant again after the situation and she talked at length about her grief. She was riding in a car and she said, "This is not supposed to happen." She talked about how she dropped off her child for a day of school and came back to they got shot. At one point do people wake up in these meetings in Congress and say OK lets get this done. Lets make this world a safer place? The love of money is truly the root of evil!
Blog Post #9 was was essentially the importance of rewriting and looking at a scene from another view. As a writer, many times I can be bogged down by narrow minded thinking. I may truly feel my work is good because it is smooth and makes a ton of sense to me. However, rewriting it from another point of view and changing the tense also changes the tone. I feel that when tone is change so is the power of my pen. Being challenged in a way of looking at a hard life event differently sparked feelings I never realized I had about the whole situation. I once heard that when I change my view and see others feelings then i can being to grow. At the time of the event I was so young minded and mentally sick that I could not see the cancers around me. This blog helps me to truly see the whole situation for the truth and deal with upcoming events much better. Smart people do not make the same mistakes twice.
10/25/2018 0 Comments Money or Policy?"If your not at the table you are on the menu." That is a quote I heard from a panelist at a educational conference this past weekend. It truly has me asking myself, "What is more important? Money or making policy?" How can I leave a stronger legacy? Should I try to make the most money and allow that to be the power of change? Or should I only focus on getting policy changed? Clearly you must have a certain amount of money to enter the rooms or policy but what is more valuable? As I reach higher steps in life I am noticing that no everyone int he room has money but they all have a seat. Many times who they know got them in the room but does not speak to their bank account. Everyone think that Bill Gates is mean because he is only leaving his children 10 million. They are missing he is leaving his networks. I truly believe that regardless what your bank account looks like if you have the network surrounding you life will be well. If you look at my bank account I am a very poor person but if you look at my network it is not. I have a life I cannot afford because of who I am surrounded by. My network is the top of they field and I am blessed to be given opportunities that money could not put me in the room. This blog post is not about length as it is about quality. I would love to hear others thoughts on this. What is the bet way to change the world? Through the power of money or networks? Maybe Mom was right, "It's all about who you know in this world son!"
10/23/2018 0 Comments PLAY BALLI spent this past weekend blessed to be a presenter at a prestigious conference. Then I came home and saw the Eagles pregame and post game scuffle. This weekend I was blessed to be the only student presenter at a African-American Conference in Harrisburg. Due to my addiction, I have not been in these educational settings in a very long time. I forgot how these games and systems are played. My walk of life has me walking into treatment centers where people are fighting for their life. There is no situation where I can afford to be racist because I am dealing with trying to save souls. I do realize that in the 1980(s) African-Americans were sent to jail based on crack addiction rather than given the treatment that these Caucasian suburban teens are offered. I realized at a young age that the world is slanted. However, my walk of life has made me care about all people regardless if I wanted to. The CEO(s) and heads of these companies would have not have met me in any other setting but because I bring value to helping them save lives they care for me. The world is an ugly business but that is the reality. This conference awakened me to how this upper management in life works. Let me break this down. For some reason there is a sector of African-Americans who hold the keys to the doors that they younger generation cannot get into. Some of the people I met basically made it clear that if I wanted their help I had to "play ball." What they fail to realize is that is the same mindset we hate from the upper management of whites. I think it is calling the kettle black. If you know that the world is slanted and we are trying to get to where you are why would you not make that road easier? Why are you so rotten o the core that helping your own kind turned evil. They fail to realize that I have been blessed to start my own LLC and I do not need to play ball. I am going to make it regardless they help or not. No matter how much I get paid they reality is I am helping to save souls. When a mother or kid tells me thank you for helping me not to die, no money can surpass that feelings. I do not care about my status in life I care only to use that status to save lives. People forget we are only here for 100 years if we are lucky, then what? Being a Christian my morals come before any job. Lets transition that to this jenkins vs eric reid situation. I am on eric reid side of this because that is how I am morally built but that does not mean jenkins is a bad person. I would rather not take the help from the NFL and build our own bridges for what kapernick cause is. Rather than to take their help and have to play ball to get their help. I have recently had to start making a choice of calling people back that have keys to doors I cannot open or try a different route. HONESTLY, this came natural to me that the choice is i will figure it out. There is such a great feeling of knowing I do not have to play ball and I can make it. I was homeless, begging for change, dumpster diving and smelled like pee. Why on God's earth would I come this far from that type of pain to simply play ball. I wish I could ask Harriet Tubaman and Dr King if they wanted us to play ball with each other. Or if they wanted us to be different from the hell we been put through. Yes, I date a white women who is my soul mate that I love dearly. She taught me how my biases in life hold me back. I could not believe she had a Harriet Tubman book in her library collection. We have both attended the African-American Museum both wearing Harriet Tubman shirts. We love souls rather than skin. It hurts to know that people put their lives on the line and we went through 100 of years of slavery only to make each other play ball. I believe that Jenkins wants to help people and see African-Americans succeed. I also believe he felt that he would rather get something than to get nothing. He had his organization funded and capitalized off the situation. That organization will also help kids who would have otherwise never received the help. They both have the same goals just different ways of going about it. The truth is treat people like you want to be treated. In slave times I would have been the salve that ran but that is because of how I am built. I am cut from the cloth of fighting but not everyone is. The real questions is: don't we all have to play ball? I think it comes down to where do you draw the line. The truth is the NFL cuts both of their checks, so who really won?
10/12/2018 6 Comments Midterm Reflection VlogThis vlog is strictly about my thoughts on the class. What I have learned, challenges, and what I want to gain out of the class. I found this way of giving my thoughts to be very enlightening because I have to be seen. It is much easier to talk through words than it is to show a face. This is the first time I was ever ask to submit an assignment likes this and it truly made me think. This is just another example of how the class has challenged me which I point to in this video. This is my honest assessment of English Compostion II.
10/12/2018 1 Comment Found Poem of my Narrative ProjectThis is a clear vision of how my unaddressed issues ended up causing one of the worst nights of my life. Regrets is a title worth a thousand words due to the way I treated my mother. This scene tells the story of the man I used to be. SECTION 1: Free-form excerpting and remixing I keep ignoring her rules and creating my own, Feeling like the whole world owe me something, Outside I am productive man but inside this soul is a trash can, It feels all worth it when the Bacardi got me in a zone, Toast to a good night nervous as hell, But this blonde chic perfume got me feeling cool as hell, Stumble out the club with her laughing at life, Don’t even realize shit going to be real tonight, Marijuana smoke got my eyes all teary and feels like the best high I ever had, Jay feeling it got me swingin shots and kissin at the light, Bang! Bang! I am drunk again! But this time the apology has gotten too thin, And to make matters worse its cold as ice, And my momma got the police line waiting on ice, “Are you Frederick?” I am thinking hell no, Shit to be real I do not need a damn p.o., Public drunkness cost money plus I don’t want steel doors like mine, Throw my mother right under the bus and say she being weird, But I never tell her part of the story of why she is scared, Instead, I laugh at her and bring up all bad things about her, From her mental illness struggles even to how she held me back in life, I keep spitting cause the lies can't come out quick enough, I slur and stumble over words trying to be educated, Truth be told I am worried about where I will sleep, But my anger keeps crushing her spirit verbally Leaving her to weep. As the night grows longer, my toes grow colder, My hands are ashy and not classy, I take exception to the smell of Baracdi from my breathe in the air, Only if I had one more shot to keep warm, Instead I am going to need a place to stay warm. I shift my focus and try again, But the hot tea, packers blanket, and music in my momma’s house is not meant to be, “Son lets take it in for the night,” Deep voice rang louder than anything that night, Firm grip locked on my elbow, I had to realize take it in or risk taking it to jail, “Do you have a friend to call,” Police waiting on an answer, Suddenly I am pacing back and forth quickly thinking of numbers to call, I look up every blue moon, waiting for the miracle of my momma, The reality has set in and that black door will not open to a lady in black dreadlocks, I get humble and make a dreadful phone call, My headache is so severe I feel the pain in my temples, This dry mouth mixed with the breath Is a clear sign that I am a hot mess. My stomach is queasy and I can hardly see But man I need water to make this day start easy. My heart feels like its about to come out my chest My dear friend offers coffee to put me to rest. I smell the eggs cooking on the stove and I know the shower is next, But before we do any rest, He has got words I need to hold tight to the vest. Section II: Reflection Do you think the narrative provides enough descriptive language to create a compelling found poem? Do you think the descriptive language more so creates a setting or delivers the subtext of a theme? In revision, will you focus on using description to develop more of the setting or more of a theme? 1. It's not how you start, it's how you finish- High School football coach 2. I look up to the people others look down on- Chinese Proverb 3. Life and death are in the tongue- Proverbs 4. To whom much is given, much is required- Luke 5. They say I take everything emotional, but honestly I do not see any other way to take it.- Women's Daily Devotional 6. People who cannot forgive are weak- Mother Theresa 7. An eye for any eye makes the whole world blind- Mahatma Gandhi 8. Some people are so poor all they have is money- Unknown 9. The love of money is the root of all evil- Proverbs 10. Be the change in the world you want to see- Mother Theresa 11. The more I find myself, the more people I lose- Unknown 12. The time is always right to do what is right- Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr 13. With money if you save me now, I save you later- Unknown 14. After your first million the hamburger taste the same- Bill Gates 15. You throw mud I throw fruit- Unknown 16. Stop judging your life by your pain and judge it by what the good book says- Pastor 17. Only way to survive is to learn to live with regrets- Shawn Carter 18. Raise a child in the way he should go and when they are older they will not depart- King James Bible 18. If I die tomorrow I can finally sleep well because of the man you have become- My mother For a just man falleth seven times, and riseth up again: but the wicked shall fall into mischief- Proverbs That last quote has been the story of my life. The reason i have that picture up there is because I can relate to that and when I see that I see the other side. That man may be homeless today but in a year he could be college educated with a company. Due to what I have overcame in life I see hope in what most do not. 10/10/2018 0 Comments Parenting 101Accountable Parenting 101 “Today, I began the task of writing condolence letters to the victims’ families. It was so hard, but it’s something I must do. From the heart of one mother to another,” Excerpt from A Mother’s Reckoning, Living in the Aftermath of Tragedy, Sue Klebold the Mother of Dylan Klebold who was one of the shooters of the Columbine school shooting. That may be the highest form of parental accountability this world will ever see. The parental aspect of accountability plays a pivotal role in a child’s overall development. Throughout this essay, we will examine statistical information on critical factors in a child’s life and how those correlate to parents being more accountable to their children. All parents in this world, are responsible for upholding high standards in the home on education, health, and financial literacy. The greatest reward of parenting is that parents are given a chance to avoid all the mistakes they have made, and help to enhance the levels of health for their offspring. As a country, we are facing an obesity epidemic in our youth. One of the first issues Michelle Obama tackled as First Lady, was to change the rules of WIC (Women, Infants, and Children). She made it so that healthier foods were mandatory in substitute for sugary foods. The whole key to making a substantial change in the epidemic is in the home. When do I see a child, who is overweight eating things that are unhealthy it makes me wonder why and how? I have always been told numbers do not lie. The percentage of children with obesity in the United States has more than tripled since the 1970s.1 Today, about one in five school-aged children (ages 6–19) has obesity. Those stats come courtesy of the CDC’s website on childhood obesity. When the ice cream truck’s music blast throughout the neighborhood, kids run to it as if it is Christmas. What if a group of parents began a vegetable or fruit truck company? As parents, we need to ask ourselves if we are instituting a regular diet of healthy foods along with proper exercise or are we contributing to the adverse health of the children in our society? We must realize that obesity affects a child’s self-esteem which plays into so much more profound issues that can easily lead to drug dependency, co-Dependent, unhealthy relationships, and overall lack of motivation for life. How can we blame these millennia for their obesity problems if we are not accountable, for their health? I believe as we become healthier as a society, then the hunger for knowledge will begin to creep in. Knowledge is power. Imagine if there were government policy that mandated, and checked parents having reading requirements in their home. Think about how powerful this world may be if reading for every child was required. In 2017, U.S. News and World Report released a top ten listing of countries with the highest test scores of students. The United States ranked seventh out of the top ten. One may say what the problem is? Well, the key ingredient in that is America was the wealthiest of all the top ten countries. It made me ask myself how we can be the most affluent country but not testing the best? My Sunday school class laughed at the notion of a library card and said get with the times of Google. I then asked how many people have a library card and only two of the 15 students did. However, if you ask all the students the newest songs, music videos, electronic devices they can vocalize knowledge of that verbatim off the top of their brain. As parents, I feel we need to change the priorities of education in the homes. We need to start being more accountable for what the youth are digesting in their brain and how they are prioritizing education. If a child can sing the newest song on the radio, can work the latest iPhone, and can successfully crush the latest video game, then why can’t we stress that significance for education? When a child is held back in school or is not achieving up to his/her potential, how much accountability must the parent take if they had not developed a plan of requiring them to read a certain number of books per month, demanded they learn a certain amount of new words a month? How much are we asking those children to learn outside of the classroom? I remember asking my mother why I had to go the library on Friday nights instead of going to the movies with all the other kids; she merely said I do not care if you see the latest movies or have fun with your friends. I care about how many books you can read. Friends come and go; knowledge lasts forever. Why are we relying strictly on the education system to teach our children? If you want to hold certain positions in this world, education is what will get you there, but that must begin in the home with parents being more accountable. “Money is the God of our time, and Rothschild is his prophet.” That is an expert from the House of Rothschild Money Prophets documentary. The richest people do not live paycheck to paycheck; they live on consistent investments. I recently cleaned up my credit and was allotted my first credit card. I ask myself, “Would I rather live like a prince forever, or like a king for a day?” I realized that growing up I had a perspective on money that was completely distorted. Whenever I would get paid, I would buy things with no value instead of thinking how to invest for later goals. I hear many parents say they have no credit and are financially struggling. Then I look at their children and see the newest I-phones, sneakers, clothing, and they have all the latest video games. The National Financial Educators Council published a survey in 2017 that stated among young adults between the ages of 18-24 fifty-one percent said they would benefit the most from a money management class in high school. As parents, we need to re-shift what we consider valuable and focus on how we can teach our children financial literacy that will help future generations. Generational poverty has a greater chance to be upended with more parents being accountable for healthy economic behavior and literacy. How many times have you thought to yourself, if I could be sixteen years old again, I would do this differently? I believe we need to change the priorities of parenting from what the children have into what they know, regarding education, health, and financial knowledge. We need to stress the importance of applying that as a lifestyle, rather than to acquire new fads. The blessing of being a parent is that you can teach lessons from all the mistakes you have made and gave your child a better chance at life. In my heart of hearts, I believe being an accountable parent is an overall mindset. I was fortunate growing up that many Christmas holidays I spent feeding the homeless and not opening gifts. I was sometimes punished by being told to read two books and write a paper about them, or being subject to longer punishment. I was forced to take multiple vitamins, play sports, and instruments which fit into a physically healthy lifestyle. I have been in a parental role for over 15 years now, and life has shown me the measure of intelligence is not making the same mistakes twice. I made a ton of mistakes my first- time parenting, as my maturity has substantially grown so has my parenting. I recently purchased two biographies of business for my step-daughters’ birthday. I told her, if you want to own a business then you need to read up on how to run one. As parents, we need to take a hard look in the mirror at ourselves and asking are we happy with the state of the world? Are we children raising children. Imagine the powerful change that would occur, if ever parent treated their child as the next inventor or Doctor who can cure diseases? I ask myself does my home represent an environment that promotes education, health, and financial literacy or am I setting my children up to be future statistics? 10/4/2018 1 Comment The ForgottenI wish I could take a survey and ask brides walking down the isle if they are prepared to be a single parent mother with divorce. Most people do not get married with the plan to be a single parent having gone through divorce. You get married with the intention of dying with that person. We live in a country where the love of money has become the root of evil. This blog is not to give that a platform this blog is to give praise to the single parents of this world. I was recently as a drug court graduation in Bucks County. The Judge was the same judged that presided over the Cosby trial. He stated, "We always celebrate someone graduating college or winning a championship. However we should praise someone changing their life and adjusting to that change." I will never forget that because it had me take a look at my own life. My mother was a single parent in recovery whose income was that of a social worker. My family always looked at her as stupid for marrying my father and judged every decision she made with me. I did the same thing until I changed my own life and now can appreciate the hard work in that. Tiger Wood's wife after the divorce proceedings said no matter how much money she got it can NEVER bring her family back together. When I was raising my first family I remember how each day when I dropped the kids off how many single parent mothers were there. It blew my mind to think that a generation of children are being raised by single parents. I changed my life and there are certain skills that I did not realize I had until I faced these hardships. I truly believe that if I would have been raised by two parents it would have done me a disservice. My life went to the life so much that two parents would have not given me the skills I needed when life got hard. A single parent must weigh every decision with long term consequences. They cannot look at the good of a decision they must realize the negative and can they come back from that. There is no other brain that they can bounce of off that is blood. Trusting decisions about your child cannot come from anywhere. Unless you have a fountain of money you must also be willing to sacrifice. I know a single parent mother who works as a manager at McDonald's that takes her children to Disney for a week every year. I asked her how she did it and she said budgets and sacrifice. She said she makes sure her kids look neat and proper. Warm in the winter and cool in the summer. How many single parents go without so that their children have what they want. How many night outs do they wish with the girls so they can read to their children. Instead of looking at them as failures from a divorce maybe we need to realize they are incredibly strong people who can adjust to any situation in life. This may sound crazy but truth be told I believe some people are better parents as a single parent. I do believe two brains are better than one but what if those brains are on two different pages. It is easy to say how someone should have chosen their partner better, but be careful of judgement. Ask yourself could you be a productive single parent? And remember that word single parent is loaded. I will go to my grave believing most people would fold under that type of pressure. You got $500 left for the month and you have no food, cable bill is due and so is the electric. The decision is on you and the consequences will be felt by your children. Never judge another person until you have walked a mile in their shoes. Single parents are the forgotten gems in this world. I think we all should respect and honor what they accomplish each day. They do not receive the awards or accolades, but truth is their are the back bone to a majority of this country. I tip my hat to all single parents and I am thankful that is how I grew up. You are NEVER forgotten I my eyes.
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FrederickI will use this blog to write about life. Archives
December 2018
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